A Desperate Plea…

A Desperate Plea…

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I would like you to cease what you’re doing proper now, and hear, or um…learn what I’m about to share with you.

Penises are shrinking. Yes, you heard me proper — shrinking! Humanity’s twig and berries are withering away like a malnourished banana tree. Our wienerschnitzels are getting smaller and smaller, and we are able to now not shout “I used to be within the pool!” as an excuse.

Now I might think about to about half of you, this won’t be the worst information you’ve heard at the moment, this week and even this month. But guess what? This impacts the opposite half of our species as effectively since scientific analysis suggests female sexual desire is also diminishing! Yes, girls…your hearth is being extinguished by some nefarious pressure.

So, what’s inflicting this international tragedy to happen? Is it our cell telephones? Is it social media? This hormone disruption is going on due to the pesky, problematic, peckerwood-shriveling air pollution we’ve heard a lot about through the years. Yes, the exact same air pollution so many people have shrugged our shoulders at and thought to ourselves…I’m certain it could possibly’t be that unhealthy. 

Well, it’s that unhealthy. It’s time to face up for penises….and naturally, cease polluting!

Photo by Mockup Graphics on Unsplash

Dr. Shanna Swan, a number one reproductive epidemiologist and environmental scientist, has explored this connection in her book, “Count Down: How Our Modern World Is Threatening Sperm Counts, Altering Male and Female Reproductive Development, and Imperiling the Future of the Human Race“. This problem is the trigger behind our girth emergency–or what I prefer to name a ‘girthency.’

Phthalates are used to extend flexibility in plastic and, to not point out a phrase with so many consonants crowded collectively, I can really feel my libido shrinking on the very sight of it. You can discover phthalates in meals packaging, cosmetics, baby products, youngsters’s toys and extra. What’s even worse, these poisonous chemical compounds have prompted sperm counts to cut back by almost 60% since 1973.

It’s time for this disaster to be taken severely. It’s time to go inexperienced to avoid wasting the peen. However, on the opposite facet of issues, it seems as if our wind vitality options are getting MUCH bigger.